I resist asking for help

Do you feel overwhelmed, yet have the belief that you alone should have the answers or do all the work?

If you find yourself reaching burnout often, this may be what is happening. I define burnout as the dread to do things, easily annoyed, procrastinate, feel worn down – physically and emotionally, check out, get lost doing un-important things, have a hard time concentrating and edgy.

You know it, you can see yourself being snarky or putting off doing things. And yet, you keep pushing.

What is the resistance to ask someone for help? Do any of these sound true to you?

  • I can do it myself
  • I do not want to burden others
  • Others will think I am weak if I ask
  • She does it without help
  • No one will do as good as me
  • I do not like seeing others uncomfortable
  • I do not want to hear the grunting and whining
  • Fine, I will just do it myself

Explore what you believe deep down. This belief is driving WHY you will not ask for help.

But from whom? If you do get to the place of acceptance that you can ask for help, who do you turn to?

Consider the trustworthy, non-judgemental people first. Consider multiple people, small areas of help from each person.

Consider:

  • Your partner
  • Your parents
  • Your in-laws
  • Your siblings
  • Your close friends
  • Your work friends
  • Your neighbors
  • Your church friends
  • Acquaintances from your local area
  • Service organizations that offer help

No matter what your need, you deserve to care for yourself and know when you are overwhelmed and a team could make the job lighter.

Friday’s Find

Articles That Help You

I am on so many email mailing lists, I cannot even keep up with all of them! I also browse the internet for new info, new research and interesting tips. The Friday’s Find will be articles that I have read and want to pass along!

This week on http://www.ForEveryMom.com there was a great article by Kendra Barnes. ‘Show Up Physically, Check Out Mentally’ — This is The Face of Postpartum Anxiety. She gives a raw and real description of her experience of postpartum anxiety.

Thankfully, the general public is learning more of the warning signs of postpartum depression. Moms, dads and clinicians are watching for a depressed mood, lack of connection, up and down mood swings, feeling overwhelmed, unable to sleep, crabby and angry, withdrawn, lack of enjoyment and in the most serious cases, suicidal or homicidal thoughts and plans. There is help!

I am a therapist with a specialty counseling practice for women coping before, during and after pregnancy. I actually talk to more moms about their anxiety, worries, fears, tension, irritability, scanning, poor focus, repeat thoughts and images then mood symptoms. Postpartum Anxiety is real and there is help!

I appreciated Kendra Barnes description of herself and the lens she was looking through when she was suffering from Postpartum Anxiety. Great article and educational.

For more information about all 5 types of postpartum conditions, please visit Postpartum Support International. http://Postpartum.net

Pregnancy and the benefits of your 5 senses

As you wake up today, your world is ready to greet you with the smells of the morning dew, warm blankets to touch, the sunshine coming in through the window to see, birds chirping out your window to hear and the sweetness of your morning fruit for breakfast to taste.

During pregnancy, all of these senses are heightened. (Almost too much! Certain smells would gag me.)

Our body is taking in so much information all day long. The 5 senses help us to protect ourselves. If a food tastes rotten, we spit it out! If a food smells rotten, we throw it out before we even try it!

Our bodies are working so hard during pregnancy and we need all the protection we can get. We view the world through the eyes of Mama Bear. We are not invested in protecting our young.

Although, these heightened senses connect us as well. We are so much more in-tune with our own bodies and the world around us. We want to attach to others, to our true self and to our Higher Power in new ways. Being mindful during pregnancy allows us to enjoy all of these heightened experiences throughout the day.

Happy New Year!

Welcome 2020! I am excited to see what you have ahead!

After 2 weeks off of work and school, it was so nice to get back to our routine this morning. The kids were excited to leave and see their friends. I know every morning this week won’t go so smoothly. LOL However, today was full of smiles.

I had a moment to check-in with me. I started with a body scan. I can feel the effect of all of the foods, junk and sweets. I feel the aches from not staying on top of my exercise routine. I feel tight in my muscles from not keeping up with my yoga videos. I am dragging from not taking all of my morning vitamins like I used to.

My body tells me exactly what I need.

I need to stop. I need to listen to it. Then I can take action.

This was my morning post today, listen and your body will tell you what you need.

I can make the changes slowly and mindfully. I can recognize what I want to change. Then take small steps to add the needed pieces back in. So, this morning, I did my 40 jumping jacks before my shower. Ah, that felt good! As I laid out the kid’s vitamins, I made sure to take all of mine. Done!

Even when we change 2 small things, our pride in ourselves encourages and motivates us to do it again and do even more. But small steps will help us to not become overwhelmed and pressured. That is when we tend to quit – the all or nothing thinking.

The body is a miraculous machine that has many alarms, I will listen to it today.